Should You Kiss on a First Date?

Elena Knight

By Elena Knight

Est. Reading Time: 16 Mins

Should You Kiss on a First Date?

People commonly wonder if you should kiss on the first date. The short answer is that there is no right or wrong answer to this question, and it will depend on various factors.

But the most important factor to consider is if you’ve noticed signs that indicate you can kiss her on the first date. Continue reading to find out what those signs are, and figure out if you should kiss her on the first date or not.

Signs You Can Kiss Her on the First Date

1. She Is Extending the Goodbye.

Saying goodbye usually doesn’t take long, but if a girl is making the end of the night seemingly endless, it’s a good sign she might want you to kiss her. She’s likely enjoying your company and the date, but she might also be waiting for that ‘movie moment’ where you kiss her at her door.

If you’re still unsure whether she wants a kiss on the first date, try a subtle gesture like tucking her hair behind her ear and observe her reaction. If she pulls away or readjusts it herself, you might be misreading the signs.

However, if she seems pleased with the gesture, it’s a strong indication she’s expecting a kiss.

2. She Is Leaning Into You.

If she’s trying to close the distance between you, it’s a subtle hint that she’s interested in a kiss. It’s not just about getting a whiff of your cologne or going in for a hug; she’s signaling that she wants you to kiss her.

These signs aren’t just green lights for you to make a move; they indicate that she’s eagerly anticipating the kiss. When in doubt, mirror her actions and gauge her response. Her reaction will often reveal her true intentions.

3. She Is Been Touchy.

If you’ve noticed her touching your arm frequently, attempting to hold your hand during the date, or resting her head on your shoulder, these are clear indicators of her desire to be physically closer to you. Such actions could very well signify that she’s open to a kiss, even if it’s just the first date.

4. She Mentioned She Likes That.

This is perhaps the most obvious sign. Some girls are open about their preference for a first date kiss and won’t hesitate to express it. You might have heard her share stories of past first date kisses, indicating her comfort with the idea.

If she has specifically mentioned that she enjoys or expects a kiss on the first date, it’s wise not to ignore that hint. Avoiding a kiss in such a scenario might even jeopardize your chances for a second date.

5. You Felt a Strong Connection.

There’s truth in the saying, ‘When you know, you know.’ Occasionally, you meet someone with whom the chemistry is undeniable, and you feel a profound connection almost immediately.

This connection doesn’t necessarily have to be physical initially; it’s about sensing that there’s something more, something deeper waiting to unfold between the two of you.

If you experience this feeling on the first date, embracing that connection with a kiss could be a natural and fitting next step.

6. She Is Comfortable When You Touch Her.

Pay attention to her reactions to your touch. For instance, if you put your arm around her and she only tolerates it for a short time, it’s a sign she’s uncomfortable. Similarly, if you attempt to hold her hand or accidentally brush against her and she seems displeased, these are clear indications that she’s not at ease with physical contact.

There could be various reasons for this, and it might change over time, but for now, these signs suggest that a kiss on the first date might not be appropriate.

On the flip side, if she appears to relish your touch, enjoying the feeling of your skin against hers, then a kiss on the first date could indeed be a welcome gesture.

7. She Hugged You Hello.

Not all girls opt for a hug as a greeting on the first date. If she initiates a hug when she meets you, it’s a sign that she’s not only open to the idea of a kiss before the date concludes but also indicates that she’s a warm and tactile person, especially towards guys she’s interested in.

8. She Is Biting Her Lip.

Lip biting can be the ultimate sign that she’s not just open to a kiss but is deeply attracted to you. Girls often bite their lips when they like what they see and feel a strong attraction to the person in front of them.

If you notice her biting her lip, it’s a pretty strong signal. In such a case, you might not need to wait for the end of the date; consider taking the opportunity to kiss her then and there.

9. She Twirls Her Hair.

While more innocent than lip biting, a girl twirling her hair is still a signal that she’s really into you. It could be that your presence makes her a bit nervous, leading her to twirl her hair and perhaps even blush.

These are positive signs, indicative of her nervous excitement because she genuinely likes you. Take it as a green light; this is your cue to go for that kiss.

10. You Can Tell She Really Likes You.

If all the signs mentioned above don’t already make it clear, this one should seal the deal. If she displays any of the behaviors previously outlined, invests ample time in conversation with you, adjusts her schedule to accommodate the date, and shows other signs of interest, then it’s evident — she likes you.

It’s that simple. And if it’s apparent that she really, really likes you, it’s highly likely she’s hoping for that first-date kiss.

Why Not to Kiss Her on the First Date

Even if she’s showing signs that you can kiss her, there are still some considerations and reasons why proceeding with caution might be a better idea.

1. It Is Too Soon.

For some, a kiss is just a kiss; a casual act that isn’t taken too seriously. However, others view a kiss as a more intimate gesture, one that could potentially lead to more, and feel that a first date is simply too soon.

Remember, a kiss isn’t obligatory on a first date. While there are women who expect it and may even look forward to it.

2. You Want Something Serious.

When you’re aiming for a serious relationship, it’s often wise to take things slow, even with something as seemingly innocent as a kiss. Rushing into physical intimacy can sometimes lead to fleeting connections.

By not kissing on the first date, you give both of you time to ensure that the interest isn’t just for a fun time, but potentially for a long time.

3. You Are Not Sure How You Feel About Her.

Sometimes, the uncertainty comes from your end. You might sense her interest in you, but if you’re still unsure about your own feelings, it might be prudent to hold back on the kiss. Kissing her could unintentionally lead her to have heightened expectations.

4. You Didn’t Notice Any of the Signs.

The list of signs provided earlier serves a purpose. If you don’t notice even one of those signs, it’s advisable to refrain from kissing her on the first date. Without any clear indication that she’s interested in a kiss, it’s better not to take the risk. This way, you avoid potentially making her uncomfortable or making a move that isn’t well-received.

Why You Should Kiss Her on the First Date

Couple hugging and smiling.
Reasons to consider kissing her on the first date.

There are several reasons why you might decide to kiss her on the first date:

1. Because You Like to Kiss on the First Date.

The physical connection you make with someone could be just as important as the emotional one, depending on your views on the topic. If you’re someone who really values physical connection, you want to kiss her on the first date so that you can figure out if there’s something there or not.

2. Because She Showed Most of the Signs.

If she shows most of the signs from the list above, you should kiss her without a doubt. It’s enough to know you should kiss her on the first date by spotting 2-3 of the signs.

3. You Want to Make an Impression.

If you know that she’s not used to being kissed on the first date, this is your chance to make an impression, and show her you are someone who knows what they want.

What Happens if You Miss the Signs?

Kissing opportunity on first date.
What to do if you’ve missed a first-date kissing opportunity.

Missing the signs that indicate an opportunity for a first-date kiss isn’t necessarily disastrous, but it could have some negative repercussions. She might interpret your hesitation as a lack of interest, leading to feelings of disappointment or even doubt about your attraction to her.

This misinterpretation might reduce her enthusiasm for a second date. However, all is not lost. If the first date ends without a kiss and you later realize you missed an opportunity, it’s time for some quick but thoughtful damage control.

Text her and inject a bit of flirtatious charm into your message. Use this as an opportunity to express your anticipation for the next date and hint at the possibility of a kiss then

To sum it up, deciding whether or not to kiss her on the first date can be tricky, but with the help of the signs we’ve compiled, it’s not impossible. Take your time, but not too much, to discern if she’s exhibiting any of those signs and is open to being kissed.

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