7 Tips to Improve Your Chances of Finding a Partner

by Afton Lynn

Est Reading Time: 18 Mins

We’ve all had our moments when there was anything we would do to find a girlfriend. I know I had these moments quite often when I was younger and, up until now, I didn’t do the research of what I could have done to improve my chances of finding an amazing partner back then.

Now that I’m married and have kids, I don’t need these tips, but I decided to share them and help anyone I can to live life to the fullest and be the best catch they can be!

I know a bunch of people who settled for the "next best thing" and never actually had a partner they wanted to be in the first place. One of my close friends was very close to getting involved with a girl who was insanely hot, beautiful, smart, interesting, but he absolutely blew his chances by showing his vulnerability too soon! I guarantee that if he followed at least a few of these tips, he’d be in a serious relationship with the sexiest woman he met!

1. Love yourself before you expect others to love you.

The most common mistake people make, but not on purpose, is that they don’t love themselves that much. It’s normal to know your flaws but you don’t need to emphasize them. I learned the hard way that if I think and emphasize the bad things, they’ll only get worse with time.

After a couple of failed attempts to be with girls I really liked, I was pretty straightforward and asked one of them what I needed to do to be more attractive to girls. When she told me that I acted like someone who didn’t love himself, I realized that was it.

I never celebrated the small victories, but every failure was so big for me that it was all I could talk about and focus on. As soon as I started thinking better of myself, I noticed things started to change for the better. Not only was I more popular and surrounded by more people, but even hotter girls started noticing me.

I knew I still had a long way to go so I kept a promise to myself that I’ll be the one I’ll love the most and that’s actually something that helped me meet my wife!

Loving yourself doesn’t mean you should just think of yourself as a king and think you’re the best at everything - you need to take care of yourself both physically and mentally! When you clear your head of all the things that bring you down, you need to take care of your body as well! If you make it a routine to exercise every day for at least half an hour, you’ll look and feel a lot better than you did before!

2. Make yourself noticeable.

Making yourself noticeable is one of the things you must do in order to improve your chances of finding a long-term partner. Now I’m not talking about yelling out loud in the middle of the street but just taking care of your appearance.

You should choose fashionable clothes and always be perfectly groomed when you go out. I’m talking about fitted pants and jeans, leather jackets, tops and all the classics you can imagine. If you’ve never been into fashion and looks, there are numerous influencers out there who share their valuable knowledge about this topic through their videos, photos and stories.

For me personally, there are three male influencers I follow, and combining their amazing tips, I’ve made a HUGE change in my looks for only a part of the cash I thought I would need to invest.

Choosing the right clothes that fit properly was almost everything I needed to do. After I got clothes that fit properly and are considered classics, I’ve noticed that I look a lot better! A lot of people have also told me this and my confidence is much better now!

3. Know what you want and what your aspirations are.

Know what you want

This is probably the most important tip I could give you. It’s not that important in finding a girlfriend, but it is in keeping one. If you’re a lazy, jobless slob who doesn’t even have an idea what he wants to do in life, you’ll probably get dumped very quickly!

Not only is this important for keeping a relationship, but it’s really important to know what you want in life. We’re not getting any younger and time goes by fast! You should explore new things as much as possible and find something you’re really passionate about.

I know this sounds hard to do, and I won’t say it’s an easy thing at all. I have a friend who doesn’t seem interested in anything and I know that he has a really hard time changing this really bad habit.

He gambled away countless relationships with great girls all because he wasted years of his life not knowing what he wanted and because his biggest aspiration in life was to find any job. Of course, every girl dumped him when they realized he was toxic for a relationship.

4. Get out of your comfort zone.

If you ever heard the expression "she’s out of my league" - this is the perfect example of the perfect time to get out of your comfort zone. I was the first one to say this and I’ve missed out on so much during the years I’ve kept living in my comfort zone.

The moment I stepped out of my comfort zone, I realized that there was nothing that was out of reach and that no one was out of my league. Normally, not every girl accepted to go out with me but I was able to go on dates with girls I never expected to say yes!

Because I was so inexperienced in sex, I even hired an escort a couple of times so I would feel more confident when I had sex with a regular girl. I found hundreds of amazing-looking girls online, but I decided to find the best of the best so I checked out a couple of reviews on EscortRankings.uk and slowly but surely found an escort that would give me exactly the experience I was looking for. It’s something I never thought I would do, but I decided to give it a go because it would be something that would make me go out of my comfort zone and give me an instant reward.

I’ll be completely honest and say that stepping out of the comfort zone isn’t an easy thing to do, but it’s a risk I’d be willing to take every time! I’ve benefited so many times since I stopped thinking about what was safe to do that I can’t believe I was so stubborn for so long!

I experienced tons of amazing things and I’ve done things I never dreamed of doing. The best thing that happened when I stepped out of my comfort zone was meeting my wife because she was one of the girls that were completely "out of my league".

5. Show that you’re interesting.

Because everyone is on social media these days, it wouldn’t be so bad if you used it to show off your adventurous and interesting lifestyle. Posting pictures regularly of you doing different and interesting things makes you look completely different in the eyes of the people who see your profile. The pictures you post tell a lot about you so make sure to take advantage of social media completely and show the world that you know how to have fun! 

Active people are more likely to get noticed because a lot of people don’t do things that make them happy. If a girl you like sees that you like to go hiking or mountain bike riding over the weekends, she’ll want to join you! An active lifestyle is not only a great way to have fun, but it’s healthy!

6. Ask questions and listen carefully.

Not listening is one of the most common mistakes people make when getting to know another person. I’m personally the one who will forget names in a matter of seconds and, to be honest, it put me in quite a lot of awkward situations. I was always thinking about what I would say and more often than not, I haven’t listened to the other person speak.

After some time, I decided to change this and I started researching why this happens. I came across dozens of articles about that problem and I’ve always come to the same conclusion: I was the problem. The part where I should listen instead of thinking what I’m about to say was the biggest issue and to be honest, it took me some time to change it.

I started with remembering the name of the other person and once I got that under control, I did more research about how to be better at conversations. I realized I wasn’t asking questions and I was always expecting the other person to take over and ask everything. That’s why I haven’t had much luck with girls when I was younger and that’s why I had tons of experiences where an awkward silence occurred.

As soon as I started asking questions and actually listening to what the other person had to say, I became better at talking to other people. It was an instant effect because I got to meet some pretty amazing people that I usually wouldn’t meet. I learned to ask only questions I was interested in. This made me find out shared interests so I always had something to talk about with the other person.

7. Have as many social circles as possible.

I’m a HUGE introvert and always have been! Because of this, I was always sticking to one social circle and a pretty small one. I never had many friends and it was one of the things I knew I had to change. When I started getting out of my comfort zone, I started calling other people and hanging out with them.

At first, it was a huge step for me because I never felt comfortable around people I don’t know very well, but as time went by, I became more and more comfortable and open to it. Because I started socializing with more people, the more people I started meeting on a daily basis. I was always direct and told people I was an introvert and that I had some sort of anxiety when I thought about calling them to hang out.

Those who heard told me right away to call them whenever I wanted to and that there’s nothing to be ashamed about. When I got support for doing something I wasn’t comfortable with, it was a lot easier to reach out and become great friends with a lot of people.

Now, I have a bunch of social circles and I can say that I can call hundreds of people every day to hang out! It was my way from going from zero to hero!

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